When she decides she’s going to walk away know it came after many undeserved chances already. Know it came after so many nights where she stayed up hurting because she believed in you. Know it came after looking at herself in the mirror with tears in her eyes repeating something like ‘I love him but not enough to keep hurting myself.’
Because that’s what you caused her was so much pain when all she did was love you and try harder than she should have. And you took it for granted not appreciating her or seeing her value. Maybe she didn’t see it herself for a while and let you get away with a lot. But even the most broken people don’t have it in them to stay in toxic relationships where they are the one getting hurt.
Know that before she walked away she agonized over it. Thinking ‘should I try harder or give up now?’ Thinking accepting defeat was a failure.
She didn’t want to walk away but you didn’t give her any real reason to stay.
And when she finally did, she kept looking over her shoulder hoping and praying that just maybe you’d tell her to stop. That you’d tell her you want her there or you didn’t want her to leave
The hardest part about leaving is when you finally muster the courage to let go and leave everything behind, you realize the other person might have never really cared in the first place because if they did you wouldn’t be so emotionally conflicted.
When you have no reason to believe in someone and you do, that’s called faith. But she began to lose any faith she had in you and in herself.
While you considered her weak for tolerating less than she deserved and staying, it was really her strength for being able to endure it. But her real moment of strength came when she walked away and didn’t look back or turn back around. Her greatest strength was continuing on when all she wanted was you. She realized you would never be the person she needed.
When a girl like her walks away, she’ll blame herself for not changing you because she thought she could. She thought loving you deeply would be enough and when it wasn’t she didn’t look at you like you were the problem, she analyzed her flaws thinking she was to blame.
When she finally walks away it’ll be with tears in her eyes. Hands shaking. Her heart beating faster. Because she knows she deserves more than a love that lets her go in the first place.